News of the Day

What with trying to be entertaining and having my living soul sucked out of me lately, I've noticed that I've been a little skimpy on any actual, you know news about me. Since probably nearly everyone that reads this thing actually knows me, that may not be such a bad idea. I mean I may have to sacrifice writing some ridiculous story about God knows what that 5 of you would enjoy for the greater good of mankind as we know it to be.

So, what has been happening with me lately? Not a lot if you judge by this thing, but experience has taught me that a man's blog may not always be the best representation of anything that is actually relevant to him, especially if you're dealing with an individual of such an unusal persuasion like myself. Did I happen to mention that I enjoy celery? Well maybe I should have. Information like that could be quite pertinent should you chance to encounter me at some wild and distant point in the future when those damn dirty apes have destroyed everything.

Well, as it turns out there is nearly always something happening to me in New York City, but I often feel too buggered to write about.

So here's a list. ahem.

1) Met great girl at church

2) Began exchanging long and exhilarating e-mails several times per day for an entire week.

3) Spent days on end contacting temp companies trying to drum up work.

4) Went to church and the Museum of Modern Art with her and her sister and her roomate. A lovely time was had by all. Seriously it was a fun time. It felt so natural like we could have that kind of time many times in the future.

5) 2 days later was informed that:

a) she dated a musician for 4 years and began to look down on him because of lack of funds.
b) went through years of therapy for this
c) therapy convinced her that she was co-dependant and shouldn't be in a relationship with other co-dependant people which since we seemed to be so much alike she was convinced that I was, but clearly this was just an excuse to cover up the deeper issue to be discussed in d as follows:
d) She could not date any more artists period. Since I'm an artist, that means I'm out.
e) Spent several fruitless hours writing to convince her of her folly including how I would work 2 jobs to support what would clearly be a very beautiful baby.
f) natch. At some point, despite the fact that she was more logic driven than any woman I've ever met, her red flags were flying and she refused to listen to any more of my supportive arguments fully convinced that there was nothing I could do to change her mind
g) deep depression. unable to write anything worthwhile.
h) yadda yadda yadda
i) briefly floated the idea of meeting with her to ask nagging questions. When she discovered that I would not give her the questions in advance the idea was shot to pieces with a buttering knife and eaten with a french croissant (She's very civilized)
j) discussed the girl situation with several close friends who all did their best to council while I forged ahead and did my best to completely ignore what they said and screw up on my own terms.

6) Prospective New York talent agent contacted me to setup possible (still) forthcoming meeting for the 16th of march.

7) met new best friend - another funny actor, writer, general enterainer also named Josh.

8) Josh floated the idea of getting an apartment together in Queens. I second the notion.

9) began a series of temp assignments.

10) first temp assignment was hair raisingly dull - a receptionist. my duties consisted of opening the door for people and sorting the mail. I mean really, how much of my time during an 8 hour working day do you think that took up?

11) in the middle of second temp assignment at hospital. More work means less sucky. Basically i do an enormous amount of filing and photocopying. I travel to 3 different offices daily in the world's largest hospital, Mt Sinai on Madison Avenue. I got lost half a dozen times in the first 3 days alone. But they're not so picky on time or anything so it's okay. In fact, it seems like a hospital is pretty ineficient in a way that reminds me of the government. Oh well. 12 dollars an hour is 12 dollars an hour no matter how you slice it.

12) unable to remember details about 12, moving on quickly to 13

13) Was reading a book called the life of Pi which reminded me that God has the whole world in his hands, so I felt better and quickly got over the "relationship" as much as you can given the fact that I'm still convinced it would work out if I had any money to speak of. I don't really think not dating an artist would have mattered if I had a recurring role on Guiding Light and was the star of the new IBM commercials.

14) Shortly thereafter met another girl who agreed to be friends with me. Due to previous female encounter, am deathly afraid of what to do next. Do I call her to hang out? Do I try to go out with a group with her and other people since we're friends and not dating. How soon do I call her just to talk? oh the possibilities.

15) Discovered that Craigslist.org has listings for actors. Promptly stayed up way too late sending out digital headshots.

16) Have been waking up way too early lately for hospital temp job due to annoyance with the work. I think dread makes it hard to sleep, and I sure dread this place. However with the imminent collapse of winter, I don't think I'll be having to worry about work and money for a while.

17) I have 3 short film auditions this weekend. One of them may actually pay something!

18) Wrote new blog detailing myriad of experiences as of late.

19) Finished blog and thought about eating sandwich

20) Realized that we are all out of bread and don't feel like driving even though store is only 8 blocks away. This is because it's nearly impossible to get a good parking spot at night so assumedly when I returned from my shopping trip, I would have to park like 4 blocks away.

21) Wished everyone a merry christmas and to my sister who is getting married in just over a month! I'll be coming home then. Look for me to appear like Haley's Comet.

22) I'm so excited right now.

23) Worried that I shouldn't have left message on new girls phone explaining that I was calling to confirm that it was her number and since it was I would be hanging up.

24) Am overthinking my overanalyzing.