I can't believe the news today - part 3

U.S. News and World Report, another magazine that I have a free lifetime subscription to, devoted like 6 pages to teens having sex. The focus of the article was on abstinence based education verus traditional sex education.

I can never quite understand why these classes are so hard to teach. I could teach them. Let's see, where to start oh yeah, let me lay it for you.

1)You teenagers shouldn't be having sex because it means there is a good chance that you could produce a child out of wedlock which studies have shown has a much lower chance to be a normal producing member of society than if he had been born into a family with a mother and father. I had to include the definition of marriage for any gay lovers reading this.

2)If you are dumb enough to have sex anyway, use a rubber, or that morning after pill thing I hear about. Yes, I'm sorry that your girlfriend is hot and you have trouble keeping your hands off her.

3)Sticking it somewhere can produce diseases which are gross.

4)You don't want to be gross do you?

5)That'll be 500 bucks, thanks for attending the 25 part class to learn all this important information.